An Idiot Helping An Idiot
by Born From a NaruSaku Lemon
Summary: A boy gets sent to the Naruto Universe and decides to help Naruto get prepared for the hardships that await him in the future, but he's to lazy to become a ninja. Will just telling Naruto what to do help him prevent some events and win Sakura's heart? NxS
1. Chapter 1

AN/ This idea, and many others, keeps bugging me and I thought it was a pretty good one for a story so I decided to write it down. The fact that it got posted means that I've either posted enough chapters for my other stories to be able to slack away from them or I've just decided to post it cause I was bored and couldn't come up with anything for my other stories.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

**An Idiot Helping An Idiot**

Chapter 1: Life Gets Interesting

A teenage boy, of around fifteen, was sitting in his living room, upside down on his couch, thinking about the anime show, _Naruto_. He had just finished re-watching an episode in which Sasuke, who he hated with a passion, defeated Naruto in a battle at some place called 'The Valley of the End' or something like that, he couldn't really remember nor did he care.

He was upset, not only because he didn't like the fact that Sasuke had beaten Naruto, but also because he didn't like the episode where Sakura had 'admitted her love' for Sasuke and where she asked Naruto to bring him back. He was a hard core NaruSaku fan so those particular episodes bugged him, a lot.

_'I can't believe that shit happened!' _the boy thought, swinging his arm down on the armrest of the couch only to have pain shoot through his forearm. With a couple of choice words, he shifted his body so he sat upright while holding his throbbing arm.

"Well this sucks, now I'm mad _and_ hurt." he said, getting up to to grab the remote to the T.V. From the coffee table before him. When he turned it on he cursed. It was one of the earlier episodes of _Naruto_, one of the ones where he was and idiot and really weak.

Deciding he'd rather not watch the blond fictional ninja act like an ass, or a pink haired girl fawn over a prick, he turned off the T.V. and lied down on the couch.

"Man, if only I could change _Naruto_ a little." he said, combing his hand through his long black hair. If it was left to hang in front of his face, it could hide most of it, his hair easily reaching past his nose and a little above his upper lip. "It'd be cool if I could go to the _Naruto_ universe and I could talk to him." he mused.

"First thing I'd do is smack him for wearing that ugly ass orange jump-suit." he was starting to get sleepy, half from the small scalp massage he was giving himself and half from staying up all night finishing his essay for English.

"Then I'd try to help him out," he yawned, "try to tell him what was gonna happen later in his life," a smile crossed his face, "and help him get Sakura." he finished by getting more comfortable on his couch. Before sleep consumed him, he muttered a couple more words.

"Man, I so wish I could do that..."

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The boy woke up to some loud yells, angry yells from what he could tell. He slowly yawned, stretched and tried to reach for a pillow to place under his head. The yelling seemed to be getting closer and he could now also hear what seemed to be the sound of faint crying.

"Ugh..." he groaned, doubling his effort to find the pillow so he could place it over his ear instead in an attempt to block the noise. When the sounds got clearer as his body woke up, much to his dismay, the sounds got louder, and he could definitely hear some crying nearby.

"Don't tell me that little bitch scrapped his knee again." he grumbled, thinking about his younger brother who seemed to cry about everything. He sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and called for the five year old kid.

"Yo, come here and shut the hell up!" he yelled, still rubbing his eyes but he could hear shuffling near him and soon the crying came from beside him, although a little less loud, the yelling, though, didn't go down at all in volume.

When he finally stopped scratching his eyes and opened them, he raised an eyebrow at the kid in front of him. "The fuck are you?" he asked, looking the boy up and down.

He was probably the same age as his little brother so at first he thought it was one of his friends. Then he noticed he was wearing clothes that were so worn out, they looked like rags, orange rags. He also saw that the boy had spiky blond hair and deep blue eyes, well he could only see one eye on account of the boy scratching the other one. When he saw the strange lines on the boys face, he started feeling like he'd seen the boy somewhere.

"Well, who are you?" he asked again when he didn't get a response. "What's your name kid? And why are you in my house, crying?" the boy sniffed a little before answering.

"M-my name is N-Naruto," the boys eyes almost bugged out of his head, "and the old man told me this was going to be my new home," the younger of the two boys looked down, "but if you're already living here, I guess I'll leave."

The black haired boy took his first look around the room when he heard the boy, apparently Naruto, say it was his. The room looked to be in fairly good shape, nice flat white walls and smooth looking gray floor tiles. He noticed that he was laying on an old black sofa and that a kitchen area was visible behind the sofa.

This clearly was not his house. He looked at the young Naruto and found him making his way to the door, rubbing his eyes with his fists. "Wait," called the teenager, "come back here." he ordered in a calm voice.

Naruto hesitated a little but he turned around and stared at the black haired boy, not getting any closer.

The older boy smiled. "Come here." he motioned for Naruto to get closer with his hand but the blond wasn't moving an inch. "Come on kid, I promise I won't hurt you or anything." he said, watching Naruto slowly inch closer until he was standing within arms reach.

Naruto stared at the strange guy in front of him and saw he had dark blue eyes, a red shirt that had one side completely pushed up over his left shoulder, exposing an arm that wasn't too muscular but it wasn't too scrawny either. He had a white shirt under the red one and he had dark blue baggy pants. Naruto thought the boy's had shoes were a little weird but didn't say anything for fear of being beaten, again.

The boy thought of some way to start a conversation with the young blond who would grow up to be hunted for the thing he held inside. Then it hit him.

"Naruto," he started, gaining the young boy's attention, "your last name is Uzumaki, isn't it?" he asked.

Naruto nodded, hesitantly, thinking that once the stranger found out his full name, he'd yell at him and hit him, just like everyone else that saw him. He was surprised when the teen grinned widely.

"It really is you, huh!?" he yelled happily, gaining a raised eyebrow from the younger boy. "Sorry," he started, grinning sheepishly, "just I always wanted to meet you." he said, making Naruto even more confused.

"Why would you want to meet me?" he asked, pointing at himself.

The black haired boy smiled. "Ah, no reason really." he said. Then he got an idea. He remembered that in one of the last manga issues, they had revealed who Naruto's parents were, and since he seemingly got his wish to meet Naruto, he planned on changing some things.

"Hey, Naruto, what do you know about your parents?" he asked in a serious voice.

Naruto looked a little confused at the sudden change of subject but his look soon changed to one of sadness. "I don't know anything about them, the old man says that they both died when I was born and that I have no other family." he said before looking up at the dark haired boy. "Why? Do you know who my parents were?" asked Naruto.

The boy smiled so wide, Naruto thought his face would split. "Actually, yes, yes I do." he stated and Naruto's eyes widened.

"Really!? Can you tell me who they were!?" he half yelled, half asked. The older boy smiled down at Naruto.

"Well I'll tell you who your mom is now," he stood up and looked around, "then we can visit the Hokage cause I want you to see a picture of your dad before I tell you, since you probably won't believe me." he said, laughing a little at the pout on Naruto's face.

"Aw man," he said, arms crossed across his chest and his head to the side, "why do we have to go see the old man?" he asked, causing the older boy to chuckle. Naruto looked up at him. "Hey... you aren't just messing with me, are you? I mean, do you really know who my mom and dad are?" he asked, his voice completely serious.

The boy smiled at Naruto. "Okay, you want to know about your mom?" Naruto nodded his head. "Alright, your mom's name is Uzumaki Kushina, she came from Uzu no Kuni, she had red hair, she was kind of a tomboy and... well, I don't know too much about her but I do know more about your dad." he said, making Naruto look up at him.

"So, who's my dad? What's he look like? Was he a strong ninja?" he bombarded the older boy in questions that started to annoy him.

"Hey, shut the hell up!" he yelled after Naruto asked if his dad liked orange like he did. "Now, if you really want to know about your dad, lets hurry and get to the Hokage's office." he said, seeing Naruto nod vigorously before he ran towards the door.

"Come on, come on! Let's go already!" he yelled, opening the door and he was about to run out the door before the older boy grabbed the back of his shirt collar. "Ack!" was the sound he made when he tried to run outside.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, where do you think you're going, shrimp?" he asked and Naruto looked up at him with a puzzled look. "Did you forget, the people don't like you that much." he reminded the bright blue eyed boy, watching his face fall.

"Oh, right..." Naruto muttered, sadly. He then looked up at the older boy. "Why don't they like me? Did I do something wrong?" he asked, tears coming back into his eyes.

The black haired boy kneeled down and brought him into a hug, thinking there was no difference between Naruto and his little brother, partly since they both acted like idiots, not that he had the right to say he wasn't one himself. A negative seven in English hardly says genius.

"No Naruto, you did nothing wrong, it's just... well, some people are just dumb and are trying to blame you for things you didn't do because to them, you're a nobody right now, but that'll change after we talk to the old man." he said, leaning back to wipe the tears from Naruto's eyes.

"Now, let's get you changed and then we'll find some way to get you outside without people glaring at you." he said. "Do you have any better clothes than these?" he pointed at Naruto's shirt. Naruto thought for a second before his face lit up.

"Yea, the old man told me there was some new clothes here after he told me this is my new home, I was going to come home and change but some villagers started throwing things at me and then started chasing me." Naruto started to walk to his room. "When I lost them, I came here and that's when I saw you sleeping on the couch." he opened the door and started to pull his clothes off, while still in the door way.

"Hey," the black haired boy grabbed a couch pillow from the floor and threw it at Naruto's back, effectively stopping him but also making him fall forward, "don't just change there, go in your room and close the damn door, idiot!" he yelled.

Naruto laughed an embarrassed laugh. "Oh yea, sorry, I forgot about you." he said as he got up and walked into the room, closing the door.

The dark blue eyed boy sighed before sitting on the armrest of the couch. _'Now, how the hell am I gonna get him to the old goat's office without the damn villagers chasing him again?' _he thought to himself, hearing Naruto shout something about 'cool new orange clothes' making him sigh again.

"If that idiot comes out in a hideous orange jump-suit, I'm going to smack him, then I'm going to smack the old goat for giving it to him." he said, rubbing his temple. After five more minutes, Naruto came out in, much to the black haired teen's dismay, a smaller version of the orange jump-suit he'd be wearing in a couple years.

_'Not if I can help it.' _he thought, already forming plans to burn the damn thing while Naruto slept. He remembered what he said he'd do if the blond came out so he grabbed the other pillow and threw it at Naruto, hitting him in the face.

"Hey, what was that for!?" Naruto yelled, forgetting the question he was going to ask the older boy.

The teenager narrowed his eyes. "Naruto, dude, why do you like the color orange, it's such a dumb color." he said, watching Naruto pick up the pillow. Naruto suddenly threw the pillow back at the older boy, surprising both when it hit the boy and made him fall of the armrest of the couch. "You little bitch."

"That's what you get for insulting orange." Naruto said, a small smirk on his face. He walk closer to the boy and sat where he fell from. "And what's wrong with orange, I like orange!" he exclaimed.

"Well, first, it's one of the ugliest colors out there." Naruto turned his head away from him. "And second, if you want to be a ninja, you can't wear orange, it's like a rule." he lied and heard Naruto groan.

"Aww, really?" Naruto asked, eyes silently pleading at the boy to tell him it wasn't true. The boy just nodded his head. "Man..." Naruto let out, disappointment evident in his voice.

The teen stood up and walked in front of Naruto. "Yea, so while we're at the old man's office, ask him for some normal clothes, got it?" Naruto nodded his head. "Good, now hold still squirt." he pulled out a pair of dark blue shades from his pocket and also a black bandanna. He gave Naruto the shades while he folded the bandanna so he could make it hide Naruto's whiskers.

Naruto put on the blue shades and watched the older boy as he folded a small piece of black cloth. He was a bit surprised when he suddenly tried to tie the cloth around his face and Naruto, having experienced something like this where some guy did this and threw him in a lake with his hands and feet tied up, started to freak out.

"Ah, What are you doing!?" Naruto yelled, trying with all his might to push off the black haired boy.

"Hold still you idiot, we gotta hide your whisker marks so people don't recognize you." said the larger boy, struggling to put the damn bandanna on Naruto's face. Suddenly Naruto stopped and he managed to tie it around his head.

"You're not trying to stop me from screaming?" Naruto asked, taking quick breaths, making it seem like he was hyperventilating.

"Wha- No! Why would I do that?" the boy asked, raising an eyebrow at Naruto's behavior.

"I-I thought you were go-gonna do the same thing this guy did to m-me before, he tied me up and-and stuffed a dirty cloth in my mouth before he threw me in a lake ou-outside of Konoha." Naruto, who had started calming down somewhat, started to hyperventilate again.

The older boy pushed Naruto back, making him fall onto the the couch cushions. "Dude, snap out of it." he said, a small bit of worry in his voice. When Naruto calmed down he pulled him back up onto the armrest and put his hand on top of his head. "You ready to go?" he asked.

Naruto nodded, wanting to learn who his father was and if what this guy said about his mom was true. He then remembered something. "Um... mister, what's your name?" Naruto asked a bit nervously.

The boy smacked his forehead, "Ah. I forgot!"

"How you forget your own name?" Naruto asked jokingly.

The boy narrowed his eyes. "No, dumbass, I forgot to tell you my name when you told me yours. I'm Takeshi, Hamatsu Takeshi." he said, grinning. He walked over to the door and waited for Naruto to walk out before closing it.

To Be Continued... Maybe...

AN/ So I'm kind of stuck in my other stories and this idea came to me. It's not gonna be the same old story where the kid is sent to the Naruto Universe and becomes a Ninja that rivals Naruto in power. I'm being different than almost everybody else, but you'll have to wait to see if I even update this story, cause like my first one, this is just something I came up with when I was bored and decided to post. Anyways, I'm off to see if I can write the next chapter of my other stories.


	2. Author's Note

**Author's Note**

While it pains me to say this, I will be taking a break from writing. This means that those of you who are waiting for an update to any of my fics, will have to wait even longer, which sucks cause I was about to post 'NWD" chapter 5. I will not be posting more chapters until I have recovered from what this site has done to me recently.

The reason for this break is that there are way too many angst fics in the NaruSaku section. Although I have no problem with a small amount of angst, these recent fics have been going **_too far_** for the fics to be called NaruSaku stories, A.K.A., they have Sakura sleeping with someone else, betraying Naruto's trust, marrying someone else, and the list goes on. It is because of these fics, that do not deserve to be in the NaruSaku filter, that I am too bothered to write anymore, or post the chapter. Because of people trying to bring down the quality of NaruSaku fics, I have become depressed, and angry.

I just have one question before I leave... What the hell!? Why are people, who probably don't like the NaruSaku couple in the first place and are only trying to mess with us who do, posting these pieces of crap in this filter!? What motivates someone to write a story where the female completely betrays the trust of the male!? The people who write stories like that are sick people, and I have suffered because of them. I already have a weak mental state, but after reading those types of stories, I'm afraid I have cracked, again. I will be back, once I feel better, but until then, you will have to be patient.

The last thing I'd like to say is that I'm sorry to those of you who have waited patiently for the new Chapter. I will try to get better soon, but these stories have really messed me up. And just because I'm taking a break from writing(And by the way people, Born isn't writing this, I'm his friend Jason, writing whatever this ingrate, Born, says), doesn't mean you can't contact me. I will still be on my computer but I will be avoiding my story files. Once again, I'm sorry for this but I don't want to post a chapter that sucks, I wanna put good chapters, that I'm afraid I can't come up with in my current condition.

-Born From a NaruSaku Lemon(and Jason)


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